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   <title>Corporate Mofo</title>
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   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2009://1</id>
   <updated>2009-01-28T04:33:02Z</updated>
   
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<entry>
   <title>The Last Professor</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/society_and_antisocial_tendenc/the_last_professor.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2009://1.212</id>
   
   <published>2009-01-20T16:14:53Z</published>
   <updated>2009-01-28T04:33:02Z</updated>
   
   <summary><![CDATA[As a Ph.D candidate finishing his dissertation in the &quot;useless&quot; subject of medieval history at Fordham University (whose press published Professor Donoghue&#8217;s book), I feel the need to offer a rebuttal to Stanley Fish's nihilistic little plug of The Last...]]></summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Society (and Anti-Social Tendencies)" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[As a Ph.D candidate finishing his dissertation in the &quot;useless&quot; subject of medieval history at Fordham University (whose press published Professor Donoghue&#8217;s book), I feel the need to offer a rebuttal to <a href="http://fish.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/01/18/the-last-professor/">Stanley Fish's nihilistic little plug of <i>The Last Professor</i></a>.

To begin with, let me relate a story that a former professor of mine, Dan Smail (now at Harvard) told our first-year seminar. It seems that a government auditor visited the department of a UK colleague of his, asking just what use a degree in history might be. The colleague stammered out something about the broad applicability of a liberal arts degree and learning how to think, but Dan had a better answer: Market forces. The fact is that people want to know about medieval history, Greek philosophy, Victorian poets, classical music, and modern art. Classes on medieval history are always full. We can twist the logic of the marketplace, aikido-like, back upon those who most insist on its strength. There is consumer demand for 1066 and all that.

Furthermore, higher education has always had an element of social climbing to it - in the Middle Ages, it was church benefices that were at stake, not higher income, but the principle was the same. If you want to fit in with the society of your betters, you have to become acculturated to their habitus&#8212;not just knowing that Bach was a Baroque composer and Beethoven was a Romantic, but intangible modes of thinking and reasoning that show membership in a certain social class and entitle one to the benefits thereof. This is what a live-and-in-person college education provides, and what the University of Phoenix can never provide. I find the notion that the &quot;education&quot; in any discipline provided by such an institution is the equivalent of a flesh-and-blood college to be laughable.

If one wants a college education worth something, one should follow the lead of the best. Look not to the merchants shilling &quot;education&quot; to the masses hoping to make an extra $10,000 per year from an associate&#8217;s degree, but to the leaders&#8212;the Harvards, U of Chicagos, Stanfords, Amhersts, Williams, Fordhams, Notre Dames, Grinnells, and Oberlins. These are schools where intellectual curiosity and a broad range of experience are rewarded, even required. For a counterexample, look at Bennington College, where Elizabeth Coleman&#8217;s tenure has been a disaster for the school&#8217;s reputation and quality.

There are also those who do not hold with the prevailing logic. As a secular Jew, I can only say thank God for the Church. So long as there are Catholic universities, there will be institutions that value knowledge and a liberal education for knowledge&#8217;s sake. A world in which something&#8217;s value is measured in dollars and cents is not one in which I care to live. We might as well do away with the ballet and the opera, sell the Rodins at the Met for scrap, and jackhammer the fa&#231;ades off historic buildings so they can be demolished to make way for condos.

Finally, may I be so bold to suggest that if Wall Street had been run by people with broad humanistic educations, rather than short-sighted mouth-breathing yobs obsessed with American football, strip clubs, and the almighty dollar, than the current economic meltdown might never have occurred?
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</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Reality Bites</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/society_and_antisocial_tendenc/reality_bites.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2009://1.209</id>
   
   <published>2009-01-01T03:54:21Z</published>
   <updated>2009-01-05T05:22:48Z</updated>
   
   <summary>We are people of this generation, bred in the most hedonistic society the world has ever known, housed now in over-mortgaged tract homes, and looking uncomfortably to the world we leave to our children. We were born in the days...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Society (and Anti-Social Tendencies)" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[We are people of this generation, bred in the most hedonistic society the world has ever known, housed now in over-mortgaged tract homes, and looking uncomfortably to the world we leave to our children. We were born in the days when the Soviet Union was the Evil Empire, a college degree was the ticket to the middle class, and being born American meant that unlimited opportunity was your birthright. We saw the Soviet empire fall, and realized that we had geared our entire society to prepare for a war that no one had dared fight.

Our college degrees hang on our walls, but though our mental horizons have been expanded, our economic opportunities have not. We were told that success does not matter if you are black or white, male or female, and while the political successes of Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, and even Sarah Palin seemed to vindicate this philosophy, it does not obviate the fact that opportunity for all still means that most of us are doomed to lives of obscure mediocrity. The dot-com boom and bust, the current depression, the unwinnable wars in Asia, all have convinced us the truth of the anthems of our youth. We are here now, and we are not entertained.

Future historians will note that American society peaked in the late 1960s. Culturally, this is a foregone conclusion. We listen to our parents&rsquo; music and call it &quot;classic rock,&quot; a canon that can be approached but never surpassed. When we think of art, we think of Warhol and Rothko. Our top-selling cultural products have names like &quot;Star Wars&quot; and &quot;Star Trek&quot;&#8212;nostalgic Baby Boomer dreams that one day man will dance amongst the heavenly spheres, whereas in reality we have come crashing down, Icarus-like, in fiery debris. After the sun-bright Baby Boomer generation flared into supernova, it collapsed into a black hole.

We knew all this long ago. We were called the &quot;slacker&quot; generation. But how could we not be, after Free Love turned to AIDS, we saw Peace commodified and sold for junk bonds, and realized the calls for &quot;revolution&quot; were nothing more than the mewling of infants begging to be indulged? Our coming-of-age movies were &quot;Reality Bites&quot; and &quot;Fight Club.&quot; Our famed irony and sarcasm were not a sign that we value nothing: They were self-defense in a world where nothing is valued. This is the world the Baby Boomers, the so-called flower-children, have left us: A world poisoned by me-firstism, by NIMBYism, by I-got-mine-ism. Our parents' generation has rebutted the hard work and sacrifice of our grandparents with short-term thinking and situational morality justified by Excel spreadsheets.

We grow into middle age not surrounded by prosperity and security, but by our doubts and fears. Even as the rich have gotten richer, we have seen our standard of living fall. The middle class is barely reproducing itself, bifurcated into those barely treading water and those on an endless paper chase after useless honors. Our hopes have been dashed, our dreams sold for firewood to keep warm and hold back the wolves for one more night. 

I should end this essay on a note of hope, or at least a call to action. Such would be the traditional coda. However, I cannot find it within me to do so. The myth of Progress is dead; all we have to look for is a mediocre world of diminished expectations. Somewhere along the way, someone might have tricked us into caring or having hope, but we have come to realize that the current &quot;crisis&quot; is not the result of a great country hijacked by a cabal of free-market capitalists: It is, in fact, the new baseline. Things are not going to get better; all we can do is hope they will not get worse. We take from this the great lesson learned by abused children everywhere: It hurt less when we didn't care.]]>
      
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<entry>
   <title>Obama in the History Books</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/politics_and_other_bullshit/obama_in_the_history_books.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2008://1.207</id>
   
   <published>2008-11-08T04:14:54Z</published>
   <updated>2008-11-08T04:28:49Z</updated>
   
   <summary>Excerpted from the prologue of Kenneth Mondschein&amp;#39;s America: The First Quarter Millennium, copyright 2026. Some rights reserved. There is a reason why we historians organize our classes on the history of the United States from the colonial era to the...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Politics and Other Bullshit" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[<i>Excerpted from the prologue of Kenneth Mondschein&#39;s</i> America: The First Quarter Millennium<i>, copyright 2026. Some rights reserved</i>.

There is a reason why we historians organize our classes on the history of the United States from the colonial era to the Civil War, and then from the Civil War to the presidency of Barack Hussein Obama. Almost two decades after the fact, the 2008 election remains a watershed in American history.

Countless writers more eloquent than I have described how American society, up to that point, had been divided. My students find this hard to believe, raised as they were in a world where skin color is just another accidental, like the length of one&#39;s hair or one&#39;s sexual orientation. But in 2008 Obama represented the quintessential Other. While generations of immigrants &#151; whose native tongue was Gaelic, or Italian, or Yiddish, or Spanish &#151; had managed to transform themselves into Americans, the descendents of enslaved Africans had never realized this promise. In the year of Obama&#39;s birth, Freedom Riders were beaten, shot at and burned. In his childhood, fire hoses and police dogs were turned on the children and grandchildren of slaves.

But even more than the color of his skin, Obama&#39;s name was thought to be an insurmountable barrier. Remember that seven years before his election, extremists adhering to a victimized, perverted form of Islam had transformed passenger aircraft into improvised missiles, thus also transforming Islam itself into America&#39;s quintessential boogeyman. And yet, Obama was elected as its forty-fourth president.

Why did this happen? To give the simplest explanation, in the late twentieth century, American nativist sentiment, originally expressed in Know-Nothingism, xenophobia and closed borders, coalesced into a thousand subtle and overt gestures meant to widen the gap between Us and Them. Firearm ownership, opposition to immigration, opposition to sexual freedom and access to reproductive medicine &#151; all of these were totems of a tribe that, pressured by external economic factors, feared change and sought to defend itself from an imagined enemy. Playing on these fears, the memetic engineers of the New Right sold a plan of government deregulation that, in turn, increased the economic pressure in a vicious closed cycle. Obama&#39;s good fortune was to be up for election at the very moment when this cycle could no longer sustain itself.

Electoral victory, however, does not always translate into successful governance. Historians have attributed Obama&#39;s success in his two terms as President to any number of factors &#151; his reversing the ruinous economic policies of the New Right; his use of technology to transform a patrician, republican system of representative government into a responsive, flexible direct democracy; his ability to convince a country with a frontier mentality of the value of social welfare. But Obama&#39;s success was rather due to the way he embodied transformation. The ostracism and fear of blacks was the single greatest impediment to American progress. Obama, by the simple fact of his being, breached this seemingly impregnable mental stronghold, and demonstrated the truth of the motto <i>e pluribus unum</i>.

This principle, as it turns out, is the hallmark of the most enduring cultures. Rome built its empire not by totalitarian subjugation, but by extending citizenship and, eventually, rulership, to conquered peoples. The so-called &#34;barbarians&#34; that ended the Empire were not unlettered brutes who tore down a great civilization, but emigrants trying to rebuild a collapsed system. (A negative view of the so-called &#34;Dark Ages&#34; has persisted only because our recorded sources were, in many ways, the Know-Nothings of their day.) In the same way, China was able to conquer its conquerors, from the Mongols to the Manchurians, by extending the benefits of its civilization to all. We see the same in the Indus Valley and in the Caliphate of Baghdad. If we seek a modern counterexample, we need look no further than modern France, where the Sixth Republic is experiencing painful social upheaval and loss of cultural identity, and the art treasures of the Louvre are currently being dispersed through museums in the United Kingdom and North America.

That the United States remains the world&#39;s &#34;superpower&#34; is a testament to what used to be called the &#34;American Dream.&#34; The frontier, contrary to what Frederick Jackson Turner wrote, never closed; it rather became the frontier within our hearts. Obama&#39;s election marked the moment in American history when a human being could be judged not for the color of his or her skin, but for the content of his or her character. Not coincidentally, it also marked the moment when the United States turned definitively from a fortress of self-interest to a peaceful emissary of freedom and human rights. These are the principles that the pax Americana has been built on, and an inheritance that we hope to keep as a legacy for our children.
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</entry>
<entry>
   <title>The Corporate Mofo Bailout Plan: A New Deal for the 21st Century</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/society_and_antisocial_tendenc/corporate_mofos_bailout_plan_a.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2008://1.193</id>
   
   <published>2008-09-30T21:58:48Z</published>
   <updated>2008-09-30T22:14:15Z</updated>
   
   <summary>We&amp;#146;ve been warned ad nauseam that if we give Wall Street the paddling it so richly deserves, it&amp;#146;s our asses that will be red and bloody. How does that work? Well, it seems that the last time an American purchased...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Society (and Anti-Social Tendencies)" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[We&#146;ve been warned ad nauseam that if we give Wall Street the paddling it so richly deserves, it&#146;s our asses that will be red and bloody. How does that work?  Well, it seems that the last time an American purchased something with actual money rather than on credit was sometime in the early 70s. Increasingly easy access to credit has built up an immunity to the toxic effects of an overdose better than the Dread Pirate Roberts did with iocaine powder.

And boy, have we overdosed. Unlike Sarah Palin, credit isn&#146;t inherently bad. It can cover your ass in an emergency, it allows businesses to get started, and it enables people to pay over time for big purchases, like a house, that it would be virtually impossible to pay for in cash up front. Credit at the general store was how great-grandpa got basic necessities until the crops were sold each year. He&#146;d pay his account in full after the harvest and the cycle would repeat. Except that now the general store is Wal-Mart and grandpa is charging groceries because he can&#146;t pay for his prescriptions, his property taxes and his food with his job as a greeter. Credit no longer tides us over temporarily; it has become a way for Americans to live beyond their incomes, to spend much more than they earn, consistently, year after year. Some Americans are slapping down the plastic because they have to have that $800 prescription drug or they will die, others because they have to have those $800 Manolo Blahniks or they will simply DIE. In either case, we never expected a day of reckoning when we&#146;d have to cough up some of this hypothetical money.

At least, we thought we were immune, until the 21st century&#146;s first Black Monday. Sure, the market is rallying on Super Duper Jewish New Year Tuesday, but this could be eye-of-hurricane stuff, it could be like the zaftig yet supposedly consumptive diva rising from her deathbed for one last aria before she abruptly and inexplicably expires. Now, those of us who have had our coffee and are able to shift our focus from our Wiis or wee-wees for a millisecond, are asking ourselves the following questions:

<em>WTF is going on?</em>

Here is the Readers&#146; Digest condensed version:  People got loans who couldn&#146;t afford to pay them back. The financial institutions&#151;that&#146;s such a dignified name, we&#146;ll just call them Credit/Risk Analysis Professionals (CRAP)&#151;that issued these loans sold them before the ink was even dry on the contracts, passing the risk onto some other piece of CRAP that was gullible enough to buy them, leaving the issuing CRAPper with no incentive to give a shit if the loans were repaid and every incentive to keep making more shit-stupid loans. The CRAP that was buying these loans eventually got a farking clue that they weren&#146;t worth the bog roll they were printed on, and stopped buying, leaving the last CRAP purchaser holding a smelly bag of shit.

These steaming piles are preventing the CRAPs that are holding them from issuing any more credit until they can offload this shite. Without credit, no one buys shit. Without people buying shit, the people selling shit go out of business. Which means that their employees and suppliers no longer have any money (or credit) to buy shit. Which means that the economy gets stopped up like your toilet from too much shit not moving through the pipes and then we are all in deep shit.

And we should add that shit travels globally these days. The CRAPs that are left holding these steaming piles of American shite could be located in London, Beijing or Auckland. So when we say we could be up shit&#146;s creek without a paddle, we mean the Danube as much as the Hudson.

<em>Why should I care if these stupid pieces of CRAP drown in a cesspool of their own making?</em>

Because going cold turkey on credit will mean that they flush us down with them.

<em>But don&#146;t we need to get our heads out of our asses and end this crappy cycle of endless credit?</em>

It wouldn&#146;t be a bad idea. But think of it like anal sex: would you rather take it up the ass suddenly, with no warm-up fingering, no lube, or would you rather work up to it slowly and gently?

<em>Ok, I see your point, how do we relax our sphincters then?</em>

With the three R&#146;s:  Regulations, Relief and Rectitude

<strong>Rrrrregulations:  You loan it, you own it</strong>

The feds need to get their finger out and restrain the issuing of credit and the international trade in debt. From now on, loans can not be sold by the original lender. If they&#146;re stuck permanently holding the bag, it just might put a damper on the CRAPs making totally dumbshit loans. Debt-to-income ratios and credit worthiness should be matters of national policy, not individual judgment calls by the CRAPs. The CRAPpers will whine that big daddy government shouldn&#146;t tell them how to run their business, but they&#146;ve already proven that, like toddlers who reach into their nappies and smear shit on the walls, they cannot be left unsupervised.

These restrictions should be phased in to avoid a cold enema-like shock to the system. Credit should become progressively harder to obtain over a 15 year period, to prevent the massive recession that would occur if suddenly no-one could buy shit.

For example, it used to be the norm that you had to put 20% down on a house purchase. That was gradually whittled to 10%, then 5%, then 3%, then 0% down and 100% mortgages became the stupendously moronic norm. That process needs to occur in reverse. If the law were changed overnight to require at least 20% down on all house purchases, the real estate market would collapse. So, the % down needs to be increased incrementally so buyers and sellers have a chance to adjust and plan accordingly. The same concept should be applied to other types of credit, such as auto loans, credit cards, business loans, etc., with a gradual tightening of standards. Credit card limits should be lowered as each payment is made, and credit worthiness standards for auto and other loans should be tightened slowly, to strike a balance between people getting loans they can&#146;t possibly pay back and every auto dealership and other credit-dependent business in the country suddenly going belly up.

<strong>Relief: Taking an enormous collective credit dump</strong>

Most existing loans need to be forgiven, with no tax liability, to wipe the toilet bowl clean. Why?  Because individuals and businesses are spending most of their incomes on debt payments. This effectively prevents everyone from adjusting to the new world order of no easy credit in the future. I know this is difficult for many of today&#146;s Americans to grasp, but paying for shit in the future with real currency instead of Monopoly money is going to mean actually having some of it around. Like, in a savings account&#151;remember those?  Americans&#146; savings habits were better in the Great Depression than they are today. The savings rate is a negative number, folks. Do you grasp what that means?  It means we are, in the aggregate, spending more than we earn every year, getting deeper into debt doodoo. Most Americans are making the minimum monthly payments on their particular steaming pile o&#146;debt, and then continuing to live on credit, not just because we can, but because we have no real money left after each paycheck is divided up amongst our creditors. The only way to get off this sorry-go-round and start saving for purchasing in a world of drastically reduced access to credit is to eliminate that pile o&#146;debt. Think of it as a collective declaring of bankruptcy. To whit:

Student debt:
-	All extant federal student loans should be forgiven.
-	Private student loans should be paid off by the feds.
-	Higher education should be free to eliminate the need for future student loans.

Medical debt:
-	All existing medical debt should be forgiven&#151;i.e., paid off by the feds, not the patient.
-	Universal health care should be implemented so no future medical debt is accumulated.

Housing debt:
-	There should be a moratorium on all foreclosures.
-	All subprime mortgages should be refinanced to make the payments affordable for the homeowner.
-	All future foreclosure action should be vetted with heavy oversight to ensure that the homeowner is genuinely at fault rather than a victim of predatory lending or circumstances beyond their control. Legitimate foreclosures would be allowed to proceed, but eliminating illegitimate foreclosures would reduce the number to almost 0.

<strong>Rectitude: the formal, dignified air assumed by a proctologist just prior to an exam</strong>

That&#146;s right, no whinging. We are all going to have to suck it up, drop trou, and take our financial pessary. It isn&#146;t going to be any easier for the CorporateMoFo staff than it is for you. In fact, it&#146;s going to be harder for us because we live in New York, where there is all this neat shit to buy. We hoped the chickens wouldn&#146;t come home to roost for another few generations but, since they have, look on the bright side: farm fresh eggs for everyone.
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<entry>
   <title>How Governor Palin Can Keep Her Internet Tubes Safe</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/politics_and_other_bullshit/how_governor_palin_can_keep_he.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2008://1.192</id>
   
   <published>2008-09-18T15:28:46Z</published>
   <updated>2008-11-09T16:01:29Z</updated>
   
   <summary>The Internets are all lit up about Governor Palin&apos;s Internets being &quot;hacked,&quot; as they call it - or so my aides tell me. The cyber-ruffians, or &quot;hackers,&quot; have invaded her sacred privacy like so many Federal fraud ivestigators. Pictures of...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Politics and Other Bullshit" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[The Internets are all lit up about Governor Palin's Internets being "hacked," as they call it - or so my aides tell me. The cyber-ruffians, or "hackers," have invaded her sacred privacy like so many Federal fraud ivestigators. Pictures of her family have been posted on Gawker, together with private e-mail addresses. This is particularly grave crime, since every teenage boy in America not only knows that Bristol puts out, but that you don't have to worry about knocking her up.

I realize that many of you see me in particular and Alaskans in general as a bunch of out-of-touch, penguin-fornicating, moose-shooting, retarded-offspring-having, inappropriate-gift-taking, non-cyber-saavy rednecks. This is not true. There are no penguins in Alaska. Penguins live at the South Pole. (Also <a href="http://www.martybeckerman.com/">Marty Beckerman</a> hails from this great state. But he's a Jew, so he doesn't count.)

Furthermore, this is my 40th year in the Senate. Far from being a senile old geezer, I am as an experienced wolf who has survived many seasons of being shot at from helicopters. Few living politicians, save perhaps for Ronald Reagan, can make such boast. Therefore, my experience on the matter of Internet hacking may be of some help.

What our esteemed Governor Palin failed to recognize is that the Internet is a series of tubes. It's not like a truck, where you can just take the keys and maybe put The Club on the steering wheel. The Internet Tubes go everywhere, like Bugs Bunny taking a wrong turn at Albuquerque. Your best bet for cyber-security, therefore, is to disconnect your computer from the Internets when you are done using them. A good way of doing this is to unplug it from the wall. You should also unplug your toaster, microwave, and TV, since the hackers may try to get into your computer that way.

However, some Internets today can also travel through the air like Alaska mosquitoes. These "wi-fi" Internets, also like Alaska mosquitoes, can be the most dangerous. Also like Alaska mosquitoes, citronella spray does nothing to keep them away. What you need in this case is a shotgun, about 12-gauge, loaded with buck shot. Don't use bird shot; that just makes the 'skeeter mad. Wait until you hear the characteristic buzzing, and then shoot the Internet box. This is why the Second Amendment is our God-given right.

Some people might say that the Internet tubes can also be blocked. However, as a pro-life advocate, I can not endorse blocking your tubes. Keeping tubes open is God's will. Under no conditions should Governor Palin get her Internet tubes tied. Instead, she should keep on pumping out oddly-named Christian babies to fight in Iraq, breed the next generation of Christian babies, and/or be wards of the state.

Another option is to keep your Internets in a safe and only take them out when you intend to use them. This is what I have my staff do. At the end of the day, all of our computers and our Internets go into the big safe in the office. They complain loudly, but I just tell them, at the end of the day, it's the only way to be sure.

After all, somebody might look in your files to see how much you spent to renovate your house.

Hey, in my experience, it's been known to happen.]]>
      
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<entry>
   <title>But Are They Good For the Jews?</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/politics_and_other_bullshit/election_2008.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2008://1.191</id>
   
   <published>2008-02-07T10:53:37Z</published>
   <updated>2008-10-03T21:32:35Z</updated>
   
   <summary>Whether or not a particular public figure is Good For The Jews is serious Pesach dinner-table conversation in my family. Their Jew-rating is usually predicated not on their politics or views towards social justice, but on two much more important...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Politics and Other Bullshit" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[Whether or not a particular public figure is Good For The Jews is serious Pesach dinner-table conversation in my family. Their Jew-rating is usually predicated not on their politics or views towards social justice, but on two much more important factors: Their support of Israel, and their hostility towards universal health care (because my family, save for me, is a bunch of Mercedes-driving doctors). Nixon, for instance, is thoroughly approved of because he supported Israel. I can imagine our beardy shetl-dwelling ancestors hiding from the Cossacks and having the same argument about Napoleon: &#34;Well, he&#39;s plunged all of Europe into war and resulted in the deaths of half the men in France, but he&#39;s Good for the Jews!&#34;

The following, then, is my family&#39;s scorecard:

<b>Clinton</b>: Bill wanted Israel to make concessions to the PLO. Put her in the White House, and he&#39;ll be right there undermining Eretz Yisroel. Also, she supports expanding health care, which will cut into my uncle&#39;s urology practice. Verdict: Not Good For The Jews.

<b>Obama</b>: Sure, he SAYS he supports Israel. BUT he&#39;s buddies with Jeremiah Wright, Jr., who&#39;s all into that anti-Semitic liberation theology crap, and he once listened to Edward Said give a speech. Plus, he has a Muslim name and he&#39;s a schvartze. Verdict: Not Good For The Jews.

<b>Edwards</b>: Made his money suing doctors. Verdict: Not Good For The Jews. We&#39;re glad he&#39;s out of the race, and we don&#39;t want to see him as Vice President.

<b>McCain</b>: We&#39;re not really sure what this guy wants. He did say he wants to end the war, but he also voted to continue it. On the other hand, he opposes torture. So, if there was a nuclear bomb hidden on Delancey Street, he wouldn&#39;t pull someone&#39;s fingernails off to find it? If there&#39;s one thing Jewish history has taught is, it&#39;s that sometimes it&#39;s OK to torture people. Verdict: Not Good For The Jews.

<b>Romney</b>: He&#39;s a Mormon, and they baptize Jews ex post facto, which is worse than Hitler, who just wanted to kill us. Massachusetts passed mandatory health care under his tenure. Verdict: Not Good For The Jews. We're glad he dropped out.

<b>Giuliani</b>: Made New York safe for real estate. His platform is essentially making war without end on the Muslim world, and calls Israel &#34;brand-name&#34; security. Nine out of ten West Bank settlers say he&#39;s Israel&#39;s best choice. Really, if you&#39;re not guilty of terrorism, you&#39;ll have nothing to fear under his duce-dom. We want McCain to make him Vice President, and then die. Verdict: Good For The Jews.

<b>Huckabee</b>: Evangelistic Christian who believes Israel must exist for the End Times to come. Doesn&#39;t really give a shit about socialized medicine. Wants to build a wall across the U.S.&#39;s southern border to keep the Pakistanis out. If there&#39;s one thing we Jews like, it&#39;s walls, wailing, West Bank, or otherwise. Verdict: Good For The Jews.
]]>
      
   </content>
</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Ten Things the Government Can Do With Our &quot;Tax Rebates&quot;</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/politics_and_other_bullshit/ten_things_the_government_can.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2008://1.190</id>
   
   <published>2008-01-24T21:20:51Z</published>
   <updated>2008-10-03T21:32:12Z</updated>
   
   <summary>Faced with an economy that&apos;s been fucked three ways to Sunday, the geniuses inside the Beltway decided that, rather than admitting that the housing market&apos;s overdose of laissez-faire was the problem, opted for bread and circuses (or at least frozen...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Politics and Other Bullshit" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[Faced with an economy that's been fucked three ways to Sunday, the geniuses inside the Beltway decided that, rather than admitting that the housing market's overdose of laissez-faire was the problem, opted for bread and circuses (or at least frozen pizza and American Gladiators). As we may remember, tax rebates proved a genius idea and had a huge effect of the economy last time they went out. If you give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day; if you give him some dynamite and a well-stocked trout pond, he'll feed his whole freaking family. Therefore, rather than funneling this paltry sum of $150 billion directly into the local gas stations, Costcos, and Wal*Marts of the 117 million households that will be receiving $300 to $1200-plus-$300-for-each child, here's ten New Dealish things the government could do that would ultimately result in greater benefits than direct checks:

1.) <a href="http://corporatemofo.com/society_and_antisocial_tendenc/student_loan_amnesty.html">Forgive some student loans</a> or set up some scholarships so that college isn't a ball-busting expense for the middle class.

2.) Revamp the VA system so that the soldiers who got blown up to protect our oil or democracy or whatever they're allegedly doing in Iraq are properly taken care of.

3.) For that matter, try health care for all of us. I think most people will spend a great deal more than $1200 on health care this year, if you count what they take out of their wages.

4.) Wasn't Social Security in trouble? Shouldn't we bail that out?

5.) Alternative energy research. In particular, the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device needs to be invented.

6.) Give air traffic controllers and other federal employees raises, so they're not living on the edge of poverty. I can't believe the air-traffic controller wage freeze hasn't received more attention. I, personally, don't want my air travel directed by the lowest bidder.

7.) Men in the inner cities need jobs.

8.) Take over the mortgages of people who got screwed in the home-buying frenzy and make them pay them at a reasonable rate.

9.) Education. Remember that?

10.) Extend unemployment eligibility.

Oh, and my dear Republican party: Unemployment benefits, food stamps, and infrastructure projects are not "extraneous spending." They're why we have a government in the first place.]]>
      
   </content>
</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Why I Would Literally Kill for Hannah Montana Tickets</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/miscellaneous_editorial_rantin/why_i_would_literally_kill_for.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2007://1.184</id>
   
   <published>2007-12-31T11:32:49Z</published>
   <updated>2007-12-31T19:35:31Z</updated>
   
   <summary>I would literally kill for Hannah Montana tickets. I know what you&apos;re thinking. &quot;Oh, the precious little moppet. She doesn&apos;t know what she&apos;s saying!&quot; Or, perhaps, &quot;I wonder if her mother read this essay before she submitted it to our...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Miscellaneous Editorial Rantings and Ravings" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[I would literally kill for Hannah Montana tickets.

I know what you're thinking. "Oh, the precious little moppet. She doesn't know what she's saying!" Or, perhaps, "I wonder if her mother read this essay before she submitted it to our contest?"

Please allow me to strip away your illusions. I know what "dead" is. I'm remarkably precocious for my age. I ought to be, what with my parents playing me Mozart in the womb and putting me on the waiting list for the prestigious Haute Ecole des Jeux des Enfants pre-preparatory school three years before they tried to conceive me. When Fluffy the class hamster suddenly turned from tan-with-white spots to buckskin, I knew it wasn't due to "hamster molting." It was because Fluffy's little corpse is mouldering down in the incinerator room where the teachers go to smoke pot while we're in gym&#0151pardon me, <i>interpretive movement</i>&#0151class. Fluffy's not coming back. Sort of like Daddy isn't coming back, though that was because he decided to run off with his secretary, for whom, oddly enough, he is able to maintain an erection.

Nor am I a stranger to violence. The boys in our class aren't allowed to point their fingers at one another and say "bang," but let me tell you, there are some people whose brains I wouldn't mind splattering around the schoolyard with a nine-millimeter Glock. That bitch Anastasia Silverstein, for instance.

Let me tell you what real violence is. It's when some girl&#0151let's say, for the sake of argument, Anastasia Silverstein&#0151is allowed to take <i>one</i> friend to see Hannah Montana and informs her coterie of cronies that they were no longer allowed to talk to me. Voila, here I am, a first-grade pariah. 

For those who are still harboring some illusions of the innocence of childhood, let me introduce you to the dog-eat-dog world that the modern grade school has become.  If you want to be in the right group, you have to have the right tokens of status that the International Toy Fair has spit at us for the season. When my brother Brendan was my age, all the junior stock traders were investing in Pokemon futures. Now it's those stupid Hannah Montana tickets, like the ones that Anastasia Silverstein's father plunked down five grand for. Mommy gets her Manolo Blahniks, Anastasia gets her Hannah Fucking Montana tickets, Mr. Silverstein doesn't get served with divorce papers.

And don't tell me it's not important or that I'll forget about this when I'm "all grown up." Without being in the right clique in grade school, good luck getting invited to the good parties in middle school, and then just try getting the part in the high school musical, getting onto the soccer team, and getting into Harvard. Those admissions officers have been bred like bloodhounds for six generations to smell "loser." And just try keeping up that 4.0 grade-point average: Studies have shown teachers don't like the unpopular kids, either. Shit, girlfriend, you'll be lucky to avoid an eating disorder. 

And so, let me reiterate: I would fucking off someone for Hannah Montana tickets. I don't even like the bitch's hoi poloi country-music BS. Nope, this is just for the bragging rights. And to rub that whore Anastasia's face in it.

So, come on, Disney. You must have made some enemies. Tell me who you want me to kill.]]>
      
   </content>
</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Reflections on Religion in America, Part II</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/society_and_antisocial_tendenc/reflections_on_religion_in_ame_1.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2007://1.159</id>
   
   <published>2007-07-30T16:29:51Z</published>
   <updated>2007-07-30T16:36:03Z</updated>
   
   <summary><![CDATA[ Part 2 of a two-part series. For Part 1, click here. &nbsp; Evolution Revolution If we follow the line of Weber's reasoning of religion-as-social-credit to its logical conclusion, the true nature of many of our current political debates, such...]]></summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Society (and Anti-Social Tendencies)" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[
<p>Part 2 of a two-part series. <a href="http://corporatemofo.com/society_and_antisocial_tendenc/reflections_on_religion_in_ame.html">For 
  Part 1, click here.</a></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><b>Evolution Revolution</b></p>
<p><br>
  If we follow the line of Weber's reasoning of religion-as-social-credit to its 
  logical conclusion, the true nature of many of our current political debates, 
  such as the teaching of evolution in public schools, is suddenly made clear.</p>
<p>When examined objectively, the first thing about American evangelical Christianity 
  that stands out is the functionally benign nature of most of its beliefs. In 
  day-to-day life, it does not matter if we descended from hairless apes, were 
  formed from Play-Doh by a senior citizen in the sky, or were ejaculated by the 
  Egyptian sun-god. Unlike, say, the worship of Kali, mainstream evangelical Christianity 
  does not require the murder of unsuspecting travelers. Unlike members of Jim 
  Jones' People's Temple, believers do not remove themselves from society. Unlike 
  the Anabaptists of M&uuml;nster, they do not practice polygamy or seek to expel 
  nonbelievers from their towns (unless, of course, they publicly call community 
  mores into question, as Mona Dobrich did). For all that their idea of cosmic 
  history was disproved in the eighteenth century, people who hold to the Biblical 
  account of creation (to cite one example of evangelical belief) go to work, 
  shop at Wal-Mart, and eat nachos at Applebee's just as effectively as atheists 
  do.</p>
<p>To continue with the example, trying to argue against the idea of the Biblical 
  creation on the basis of rational argument is useless, for those who continue 
  to perpetuate creationism do not do so because of rational conviction. Rather, 
  the creationist meme serves some utility beyond the obvious, namely: It serves 
  to identify a community of believers to one another. In other words, it is a 
  social truth rather than being a scientific truth. The primary purpose of creationism, 
  much like Jesus fish bumper stickers, is to identify members of the religious 
  community to one another. It is, in other words, what Emile Durkheim, the French 
  thinker who with Weber deserves the title of &quot;founder of sociology,&quot; 
  would have interpreted as a totem, a banner for a community to rally about.</p>
<p>To Durkeim, as it would later be to L&eacute;vi-Strauss, the tendency towards 
  dichotomy is at the core of human thought. (It is in the context of this idea 
  that Derrida's &quot;deconstruction&quot; must be understood, and, according 
  to evolutionary psychologists such as Steven Pinker and Donald Brown, may even 
  be hardwired into how we understand reality. We are programmed, in other words, 
  to see the world in sets of opposites.) This is seen most dramatically in the 
  division of human endeavors into the profane, that is the everyday, and the 
  sacred. The totem is the physical embodiment of the sacred; the cult of the 
  totem is what defines the community. However, while for Durkheim's Australian 
  aborigines, totems were physical objects such as churingas and other fetishes, 
  for American evangelical Christians, they are emblematic ideas such as creationism. 
  Whether or not the Earth is six thousand years old does not matter; what matters 
  is that the community agrees that it is.</p>
<p>The same totemic argument that applies to creationism arguably applies to school 
  prayer, &quot;obscenity,&quot; sex education, or even the words &quot;Jesus 
  Christ&quot; as they are understood amongst American Christians. Rather than 
  referring to the historical rabbi who lived 2,000 years ago, the words &quot;Jesus 
  Christ&quot; refer to membership in the community of belief. Saying &quot;I 
  have Jesus in my heart&quot; is the functional equivalent of, say, embracing 
  the Wolf totem. It marks those who adhere to it as co-believers in the sacred, 
  members of the same tribe. George W. Bush proclaiming his acceptance of Jesus 
  has made him a good man, far from being hypocritical, it, if understood on its 
  own terms, is a deeply sincere action. He, in effect, was declaring himself-despite 
  his privileged origins-to be fundamentally the same as soccer moms from the 
  Midwest and small business owners from the South.</p>
<p>So why has there been such an upsurge in religious feeling in the late twentieth 
  and early twenty-first centuries? Nixon or Eisenhower never had to invoke their 
  personal relationships with Christ. Why have Americans felt the need to create 
  these communities of faith?</p>
<p>One possible explanation, of course, is the events of September 11, 2001. There 
  is nothing that creates a sense of community more than an external threat, and 
  in a time of stress, the &quot;imagined community&quot; becomes more homogeneous-which 
  is to say religiously consolidated. Outsiders-atheists, Muslims, the French-become 
  increasingly regarded as suspicious, while the community rallies around its 
  own totems. Seen in this light, suddenly all the posters being sold at truck 
  stops of Jesus weeping over the ruins of the World Trade Center make a frightening 
  amount of sense.</p>
<p>However, even a cursory examination of history shows that this tendency in 
  American life long preceded 9/11. The intrusion of right-wing religiosity into 
  politics came not from the rural South, but from the privileged suburbs, where 
  middle-class organizational skill and fundraising ability combined with grass-roots 
  feeling to form a potent cultural force. As Lisa McGirr argues in her <a href="http://www.kevincmurphy.com/mcgirr.html"><i>Suburban 
  Warriors</i></a>, the birth of the New Right, which culminated in the Reagan 
  Revolution's conflation of laissez-faire economics, legislated morality, Old 
  Testament patriarchy, and the struggle against the Evil Empire, began in wealthy, 
  privileged enclaves such as Orange County, California, in the 1960s.</p>
<p>McGirr makes a compelling case for the rise of the New Right as a contradictory 
  blend of traditional Western libertarianism, belief in self-sufficiency and 
  property rights with economic dependence on defense spending and a deeply-held 
  belief in the importance of the family. These memes served an evolutionary purpose 
  in a frontier society, but which are somewhat atavistic in suburban developments. 
  Hostility to outside interference makes a certain amount of sense when an ad-hoc 
  local government and the freedom to scratch out a primitive living are all that 
  one requires or expects; it makes less sense when one works for a salary, pays 
  income tax, and relies on federal funding for utilities, roads, schools, firefighting, 
  and law enforcement.</p>
<p>These feelings were magnified by having passed from the triumph of World War 
  II and the economic boom of the postwar period into the defeat of miasma of 
  the 1970s. Many Americans felt their traditional mode of life is being destroyed. 
  The shift to a corporatist, service-based economy has provoked a gender crisis. 
  The old constructions of difference-the dichotomies between sacred and profane, 
  domestic and public, male and female-have broken down. This has been reflected 
  in the meta-narrative of the last three decades of infotainment, as American 
  men unmanned the economic downturn and women who would prefer to be homemakers 
  rather than co-wage earners have taken refuge in Dirty Harry, Rambo, Martha 
  Stewart, George W. Bush landing on an aircraft carrier to proclaim &quot;mission 
  accomplished.&quot; The brilliance of the New Right's strategy is combining 
  all of these anxieties into one cause: &quot;Stick with us and we'll stand tall, 
  provide for our families, and kick some ass.&quot;</p>
<p>The whole &quot;gay marriage&quot; debate provides an excellent case study 
  for this phenomenon. Just as homosexuality was equated with having Communist 
  sympathies in the 1950s, gays once again find themselves playing the canaries 
  in the coal mine of our collective anxieties. In a world where marriage is becoming 
  more a legal recognition of mutual affection and less an economic necessity, 
  a prerequisite to raising children, or a religious sacrament, same-sex couples 
  see no reason that they should not have the same legal rights as any Russian 
  mail-order bride. The subtext to conservative objections to this movement is 
  not so much an objection to homosexuality per se, but a rejection of the ongoing 
  redefinition of marriage and family life-a change that is, at its root, economically 
  driven.</p>
<p>It appears, then, that the tenets of American evangelical Christianity have 
  become a rallying point because they have become identified with the idea of 
  the authentic, autochthonic community. The fact that these goals-the dismantling 
  of the social welfare state and the maintenance of the military-industrial welfare 
  state, laissez-faire liberalism yoked together with paternalistic morals-policing-have 
  nothing to do with Christianity is not important; what matters is that these 
  policies materially benefit the community that identifies with these symbols. 
  Opposition to gay marriage, abortion, and immigration merely provide a convenient 
  focus for this particular political community, whose interests are then cynically 
  exploited for votes by politicians.</p>
<p>Thus, we return to the real significance of what happened to the Dobriches. 
  The people of Georgetown were not &quot;ignorant, shallow bigots&quot;&#151;unless 
  one wants to call a large part of America by these labels. They were, rather, 
  frighteningly ordinary. Behind what seemed like narrow-minded bigotry was the 
  anxiety three decades of uncertainty. To them, the values the public community 
  represents, and the political and economic interests of that community, were 
  synonymous with the religious community. The persecution the Dobriches experienced 
  was, in effect, the displaced anxiety of the modern world.</p>
<p>If progressives are to make any headway in changing the face of American politics, 
  we must understand the engine driving religious support the conservative political 
  machine. Rather than shrilly repeating our positions as if their inherent logic 
  was a given, we must rather make Americans see that that the values we represent 
  are their own, and that the restoration of a progressive, New Deal system is 
  in the best interests of themselves and their families. Hopefully, by addressing 
  the root causes that drive voters to the standards of conservative Christianity-the 
  irrelevance of the military-industrial complex, the economic rot of the heartland, 
  the empty values of a consumer society-we can appeal to the community of faith, 
  thereby outflanking and, ultimately, defeating the enemy.<br>
</p>
]]>
      
   </content>
</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Reflections on Religion in America</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/society_and_antisocial_tendenc/reflections_on_religion_in_ame.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2007://1.158</id>
   
   <published>2007-07-25T17:54:20Z</published>
   <updated>2007-07-30T16:55:35Z</updated>
   
   <summary><![CDATA[ &quot;It was as if no matter how much hard work, no matter how good a person you are, the only way you'll ever be anything is through Jesus Christ,&quot; Mona Dobrich explained to a New York Times reporter why...]]></summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Society (and Anti-Social Tendencies)" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[ 
<p>&quot;<a href="http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=51504">It 
  was as if no matter how much hard work, no matter how good a person you are, 
  the only way you'll ever be anything is through Jesus Christ</a>,&quot; Mona 
  Dobrich explained to a New York Times reporter why her family had made an exodus 
  from her hometown of Georgetown, Delaware, to move all the way across the state 
  to Wilmington. Like her mother before her, Mona's daughter, Samantha, had grown 
  up the only Jew in her class. Like her mother before her, Samantha had become 
  accustomed to hearing sectarian prayers at functions sponsored by the Indian 
  River School District. However, when the pastor at Samantha's high school graduation 
  prayed specifically for her &quot;in Jesus' name,&quot; Monica decided it was 
  time to stop turning the other cheek-and when a crowd shouted, &quot;Take your 
  yalmuke off!&quot; at Mona's son Alex when he tried to tell a school board meeting 
  how it hurt to be taunted as a &quot;Christ-killer&quot; by his sixth-grade 
  classmates and death threats began rolling in after she appeared on a local 
  radio show, Mona Dobrich knew it was time to leave.</p>
<p>Unlike many commentators who have criticized the Dobriches' neighbors' &quot;ignorant, 
  shallow attitude,&quot; &quot;bigotry,&quot; and general sense of entitlement 
  to Christian hegemony, I was less outraged by their case than I was perplexed. 
  Delaware is, after all, not the Deep South. No barefoot urchins out of a Faulkner 
  novel march along its rural roads; no attack dogs savaged civil rights activists 
  on its city streets; backyard pools are more common than fishin' holes. The 
  state governor, Ruth Ann Minner, is a Democrat, as are both senators, and though 
  the one state Representative, Mike Castle, is a Republican, he's voted against 
  the party line on repealing restrictions on stem-cell research, torturing &quot;enemy 
  combatants,&quot; and giving Federal courts jurisdiction on the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terri_Schiavo">Terri 
  Schiavo</a> case. If anything, therefore, one would expect Georgetown, located 
  in Sussex County, home of the gay and lesbian vacation mecca Rehoboth Beach, 
  to be more accepting than the norm. Why, then, do its denizens seem to equate 
  Christianity with good citizenship, with social integration, with patriotism 
  itself?</p>
<p>A century ago, the German sociologist <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Max_Weber">Max 
  Weber</a> asked much the same question about the United States as a whole. Though 
  he is better known for marrying Calvin and capitalism with his (now somewhat 
  dated) bon mot on the &quot;Protestant work ethic,&quot; Weber's lesser-known 
  essay, &quot;<a href="http://www.cjsonline.ca/reviews/pesc.html">Churches and 
  Sects in North America</a>,&quot; has not only held up rather well over the 
  past century, it should be required reading for anyone who wants to understand 
  the power of religion in U.S. culture. &quot;Churches,&quot; Weber argued, are 
  distinct from &quot;sects&quot; in that the former, like the Lutheran church 
  that dominated religious life in Germany, are all-inclusive and compulsory, 
  while the latter are voluntary associations of those who feel themselves to 
  be the spiritual elite.</p>
<p>Yet, for all of this, Weber saw membership in a Protestant sect as one of the 
  most powerful political and social forces in the modern world. The &quot;proof&quot; 
  of an individual's salvation, and the basis for his admission to a sect, was 
  the external performance of morality, sobriety, and thrift. &quot;This proof,&quot; 
  Weber wrote, &quot;became the exclusive foundation for the social cohesion of 
  the congregation. And the great mass of social formations, which have penetrated 
  every corner of American life, are constituted according to the schema of the 
  'sect.' &quot; Conversely-and here is where Weber speaks directly to the Delaware 
  case-an individual bereft of a sect (or who belongs to a different one, as the 
  Dobriches did) is rootless, ostracized, alien. To profess religion is to be 
  integrated into the community; to do otherwise is to be the Other.</p>
<p>In Weber's Europe, religion was not only structurally different from American 
  sects, it was also functionally different. &quot;The question concerning church 
  affiliation. . . is on par with the Homeric question regarding place of birth 
  and parentage, as a German nose and throat specialist, who had opened a practice 
  in Cincinnati, discovered,&quot; he wrote. &quot;On asking his first patient 
  what was ailing him, the very first thing the man said, to the utter astonishment 
  of the doctor, was: I am from the Second Baptist Church in X Street.&quot; Weber's 
  deutsche doctor's astonishment at his patient's incongruous utterance is certainly 
  understandable-at least until one comprehends the real meaning, which is that 
  the physician needn't worry about his fee. In Weber's Germany, private religion 
  was for the individual conscience, and the true public religion was the cult 
  of imperialistic nationalism. Social credit derived from coming from a good 
  family, no matter whether one's father had risen from the Junker squireocracy 
  or descended from the purple of commerce. Just as modern college students are 
  besieged by credit card offers, a student at Heidelberg found more than enough 
  people willing to extend him credit after he had tasted blood in an elite dueling 
  fraternity and &quot;won his colors&quot; (and perhaps a few facial scars)-a 
  sure sign of a bright future.</p>
<p>Conversely, in America, a land of vast distances settled by dislocated immigrants, 
  where a man could come from anywhere to do anything and where the aristocratic 
  schmiss that was the lingering kiss of the schl&auml;ger duel meant no more 
  than having been kicked in the face by a mule, social credit came from church 
  membership. In America, Weber wrote, one does not ask if someone goes to church, 
  but rather to which church they belong. Membership in a church &quot;of good 
  repute&quot; was essential for any business venture. &quot;As far as I am concerned, 
  everyone can believe what he likes, but if I discover that a client doesn't 
  go to church, then I wouldn't trust him to pay me fifty cents,&quot; a traveling 
  salesman said to Weber in Oklahoma. &quot;Why pay me, if he doesn't believe 
  in anything?&quot; A man in a church is a man integrated into society; a man 
  without a church is rootless. People in the past were no less cynical about 
  politicians than we are now, but they could be assured that they would serve 
  local interests and not loot the public treasury if they had been vetted by 
  a sober congregation and admitted into the spiritual elite.</p>
<p>Weber's ideas about &quot;sects&quot; hit me like a bolt from above. Like most 
  over-educated, ocean-hopping, politically liberal urban dwellers, organized 
  religion has always been slightly embarrassing to me. Jewish members of my social 
  circle tiptoe shame-faced past the Lubavitch mitzvah tank, order sushi on Yom 
  Kippur, and decry circumcision as male genital mutilation. Catholics are more 
  likely to be found chanting to Vishnu in yoga class than lighting candles to 
  the Virgin, and Hindus cheerfully trade recipes for beef stroganoff. Unlike 
  many of my friends, though, I don't characterize religious people as deluded, 
  ignorant, or, in the Delaware case, inherently bigoted. As a historian of the 
  Middle Ages, I am forced on a daily basis to consider how religion can both 
  bind a society together and tear it apart. I know that faith is a force to be 
  reckoned with-and while I may not believe in religion, I certainly do believe 
  in religious people.</p>
  <p>Moreover, it's clear to me that the collective willful ignorance of religion 
  so prevalent amongst liberal intellectuals-the dismissal of faith and the faithful 
  as an awkward cultural atavism-is our great blind spot, the fatal flaw of an 
  ideology that is otherwise eager to embrace anything different from itself in 
  the name of cultural relativism. The idea that religion is a concrete evil to 
  be stridently fought tooth and nail-the approach taken by the don of atheism, 
  Oxford behavioral scientist Richard Dawkins-is likewise the wrong tack. As Weber 
  saw a century ago, without understanding how religion works in this country, 
  and its effects on our political life, we can not understand how American society 
  works-and therefore, we can certainly not hope to change the status quo. </p>
<p><b>Manifest Destiny</b></p>
<p>In my liberal agnosticism, I thought for a long time that the true character 
  of American religious polity was best described by the 1534 M&uuml;nster rebellion. 
  In one of the more colorful events of the Reformation, an apocalyptically-tinged, 
  paranoid sect of Anabaptists (so-called for their practice of re-baptizing converts 
  as adults) seized the city and expelled all unbelievers. Their religious mania 
  quickly spread to the execution of &quot;heretics,&quot; mandatory polygamy, 
  and the belief in the immanent descent of the Heavenly Jerusalem. The government 
  response at M&uuml;nster in 1534 was the same as it was in Waco, Texas in 1993: 
  Lutheran and Catholic leaders united to begin an eighteen-month siege that ended 
  with the storming of the city and the massacre of most of the surviving Anabaptists. 
  M&uuml;nster, I thought, illustrated the essential character of Protestant evangelicalism-the 
  constitutional need for absolute political supremacy in order to found a &quot;city 
  on a hill&quot; and the inability to accept anything less than absolute conformity 
  to the faith. These ideas had been imported to this continent with the Puritans, 
  and they have remained with us ever since in the tenets of the Baptist church.</p>
<p>What Weber understood, though, is that while much of America may call itself 
  Baptist, our religious makeup is equally tinged with Methodism. Beginning as 
  an eighteenth-century revival movement within the Church of England led by John 
  Wesley and his friends, Methodism was the greatest religious movement the English-speaking 
  world had seen since the Restoration of 1660 had installed moderate Anglicanism 
  as the British state church. However, eighteenth- and nineteenth-century Methodism 
  represented a paradox: Simultaneously ecstatic and sober, traditional and charismatic, 
  working-class and elite, revolutionary and insistent that it was merely a movement 
  within the Church of England, it challenged contemporary ideas of how religion 
  fit into the political landscape.</p>
<p>The essential religious divisions in post-Napoleonic Europe were between the 
  conservative order that upheld monarchy, centrally-controlled economies, and 
  the state church (the anti-Dreyfusards in France, for instance, published in 
  Jesuit newspapers); liberal laissez-faire parliamentarians such as Weber who 
  embraced Darwin and Adam Smith and quietly disparaged religion; and avant-garde 
  socialists who saw all religion as &quot;opium for the people.&quot; Yet the 
  very fact that national churches had been a political reality in Europe since 
  the sixteenth century meant that they were for the most part, under the radar, 
  more likely to be dismissed than actively attacked. Even in Sweden, the country 
  that American liberals most often hold up as an atheist, socialist paradise, 
  the Lutheran church only automatically stopped enrolling newborns in 1996, and 
  didn't separate from the government until 2000. While Upton Sinclair may have 
  written that &quot;When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the 
  flag, carrying a cross,&quot; fascism came to Germany precisely because of liberal 
  thinkers like Max Weber, who was in favor of what J. L. Talmon called &quot;totalitarian 
  democracy&quot; because he thought it would advance the cause of the German 
  <i>volk</i> more efficiently than the Kaiser and his conservative order ever 
  could.</p>
<p>Early America, on the other hand, was a land ill-served by the clergy of the 
  established church. Methodist circuit riders, filling the vacuum with charismatic 
  preaching, were eager to create communities out of scattered settlements&#151;and 
  the people were eager to have them. Peer-led, based on community acclamation, 
  and ultimately democratic, the Methodist message appealed to everyone from Yankee 
  industrialists to working men, farmers to shopkeepers, and slave-owners to African-Americans; 
  it also sparked the mass religious movements of the First, Second, and Third 
  Great Awakenings. Naturally, the Methodist dichotomy between ecstatic revelation 
  and hard work, thrift, and sobriety could not stand, and the movement separated 
  into separate strands, both respectable, such as the United Methodist Church 
  attended by George W. Bush and Dick Cheney, and popular, such as the Pentecostal 
  churches that embrace speaking in tongues and snake-handling.</p>
<p>As widely variant as the beliefs and practices of the Methodist-derived sects 
  might be, one Methodist-derived idea that has infused all of American religious 
  life is the idea of instantaneous conversion. We are all familiar with the script 
  from George W. Bush's 2000 election campaign and any number of ironically-perused 
  Chick tracts: Having hit mental, physical, and spiritual rock-bottom, terrified 
  of an eternity spent in the flames of hell, a despairing sinner begs Jesus to 
  come into his or her heart. Suddenly everything is illuminated; the sinner feels 
  himself to be saved; and all sins are forgiven. This trope is not only a powerful 
  incentive-it is also an eminently capitalist one in which unproductive behaviors 
  are exchanged for a life of hard-working productivity and social credit in the 
  bosom of the community. It is the spiritual equivalent of declaring bankruptcy: 
  All bad credit is forgiven.</p>
<p>The implication of this cultural script is that anybody can join the community; 
  all it takes is a simple act of will and the performance of conversion. (I mean 
  &quot;performance&quot; here in the linguistic sense, in <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/J.L._Austin">J. 
  L. Austin</a>'s sense of phrases that are also actions, such as &quot;I christen 
  this ship the Queen Elizabeth&quot; or &quot;I pronounce you husband and wife.&quot;) 
  Unlike early Methodism, in which God had to touch the individual, in modern 
  conversion it is the individual who reaches out to God. Unlike Puritanism's 
  stringent entry requirements, there is no need to prove oneself one of the elite; 
  one can be an alcoholic, a drug addict, an unwed mother, or a homosexual. However, 
  by entering the Church, one is reborn into the community. (The caveat, of course, 
  is that one must continue behaving in a godly manner and fighting against one's 
  anti-social impulses.)</p>
<p>The implications of the Methodist instantaneous conversion are, if anything, 
  even more chilling than the elitist Puritan &quot;city on a hill.&quot; If salvation 
  is only open to God's elect, then the &quot;city on the hill,&quot; in order 
  to exist in a non-chiliastic world, will always need to compromise and make 
  a place for the imperfect members of society. Methodist conversion, on the other 
  hand, is manifest destiny incarnate. Everyone can be part of the congregation 
  of the faithful; all that is necessary is the desire to join. Even Mexicans 
  (the cultural and ethnic boogeyman of the moment) can become part of the community&#151;that 
  is, &quot;Americanized&quot;&#151;by accepting Jesus in evangelical fashion. 
  (And, indeed, much current evangelical missionary activity is Spanish-language).</p>
<p>Thus, there is no conceivable argument not to join. With salvation democratically 
  open to all, excuses dissolve before the weight of community opinion. If one 
  is in a milieu where the vast majority of people believe, the pressure to conform 
  to social expectations is extreme. To deny the community's will is to do more 
  than brand oneself as irredeemably Other; it's to brand oneself a sinner and 
  worthy of community scorn. Thus the comment one made to Mona Dobrich about her 
  eleven-year-old son: &quot;If you want people to stop calling him 'Jew Boy,' 
  you tell him to give his heart to Jesus.&quot;</p>
<p>Because of its evangelical nature, American religion has condemned itself to 
  perpetual jihad against all those who believe differently. When Georgetown businessman 
  Kenneth R. Stevens told a Times reporter that mandatory Christianity was Georgetown's 
  &quot;way of life,&quot; he was telling a deeper truth than he may have realized. 
  The First Amendment aside, America is a Christian nation, just as to be a Swede 
  is to be a Lutheran or to be Italian is to be Catholic. The difference is that, 
  ostensibly cordoned off from the official governance by the First Amendment, 
  never having its &quot;establishment&quot; questioned or been subjected to a 
  Civil Constitution of the Clergy or <i>kulturkampf</i>, religion's ubiquity 
  in American polity has remained unchallenged. With no establishment of religion, 
  there has been no religious establishment to be attacked by radicals or discredited 
  for supporting a government that had led the nation into a national calamity 
  such as World War I.</p>
<p><i><a href="http://corporatemofo.com/society_and_antisocial_tendenc/reflections_on_religion_in_ame_1.html">For Part 2, click here</a></i><br>
</p>
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   </content>
</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Student Loan Amnesty</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/society_and_antisocial_tendenc/student_loan_amnesty.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2007://1.156</id>
   
   <published>2007-07-16T04:12:40Z</published>
   <updated>2007-07-16T13:52:06Z</updated>
   
   <summary>In the coming election season, you&amp;#146;ll hear a lot of talk about family values, freedom, and the American Way of Life, which is usually seen as hard work and sacrifice. The one thing that you won&amp;#146;t hear mention of is...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Society (and Anti-Social Tendencies)" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[In the coming election season, you&#146;ll hear a lot of talk about family values, 
freedom, and the American Way of Life, which is usually seen as hard work and 
sacrifice. The one thing that you won&#146;t hear mention of is student loan reform.
<p>But wait&#151;isn&#146;t it the American way to pay your own way? Nobody put 
  a gun to anyone&#146;s head to make them take out loans&#151;why should we forgive 
  people&#146;s debt at public (or private) expense?</p>
<p>The fact is, loans are a necessity for paying for college nowadays, and a college 
  degree is the de facto doorkeeper to a middle-class lifestyle. However, the 
  average private college costs an average of $22,218. What&#146;s more, the amount 
  of scholarships available&#151;especially to Joe Suburban Teenager&#151;is nowhere 
  near the demand. Accordingly, the amount of student loan debt in this country 
  is immense&#151;$477 billion. (Contrast this, however, with $5.6 billion a month 
  for the Iraq war.)</p>
<p>In most every other industrialized country, higher education is at least partially 
  paid for by the government (though this is changing with the current laissez-faire 
  turn in Europe). In America, though, we don&#146;t have a parliamentary system 
  that, for good or ill, factors in everyone&#146;s needs: We have lobbyists, 
  and student loan corporations pay handsomely for representation in Washington. 
  Accordingly, student loan lenders enjoy some of the most favorable conditions 
  in the industry. Thanks to a bill signed by Clinton in 1997, student loan debt, 
  unlike consumer debt, can never be discharged. They can even take payments out 
  of your social security&#151;and this holds true both for the wholly inadequate 
  subsidized federal loans and for the private loans most students wind up having 
  to get. What we essentially have is a system where a small number of companies 
  are siphoning off a lifetime&#146;s wages in exchange for fronting the opportunity 
  to earn them in the first place&#151;a postindustrial version of debtor&#146;s 
  prison.</p>
<p>These have a very real effect on people&#146;s lives. While not everyone is 
  so unfortunate as to be saddled with debt, those with high loans wind up paying 
  in interest what they would otherwise be investing in the economy&#151;or their 
  own further education. Student loans put a dent in home buyers&#146; ability 
  to qualify for reasonable mortgages. Bureaucratic cock-ups ruin people&#146;s 
  credit. In the end, it seems to be more sensible to go to a lower-tier state 
  school&#151;or even bypass college entirely&#151;than to follow the &#147;traditional&#148; 
  middle-class pursuit of high educational achievement. Furthermore, for those 
  saddled with student loan debt, monthly payments make it more difficult to get 
  married, buy a house, and raise children. &#147;Family values,&#148; my ass.</p>
<p>But the government isn&#146;t the only one who&#146;s been bought. <a href="http://campusprogress.org/features/858/pay-to-play">. The schools have payola 
  found themselves immersed in the midst of a payola scandal</a>. To quote <a 
  href="http://www.generationdebt.org"> Generation Debt</a> 
  author Anya Kamenetz, &#147;Lenders and schools have/had deals whereby 
  schools would push students to a certain lender or lenders in exchange for kickbacks 
  from the lenders.&#148;</p>
<p>The fact is that the student loan industry hasn&#146;t been playing by the 
  rules for years&#151;and in the end, this makes us all poorer as the middle 
  class&#146;s money is sucked into the coffers of a few corporations. The way 
  out of it is to put more pressure on politicians than the lobbyists do to get 
  candidates to promise to change the system. Increase subsidized loans. Lower 
  interest rates. And take the private lenders out back and shoot them. In the 
  wake of the payola scandal, <a href="http://www.speaker.gov/blog/?p=572">, the 
  Democratic-led House has already set an example by passing the College Cost 
  Reduction Act of 2007</a>, funded by reducing subsidies to student-loan 
  companies. We&#146;d like to see the Senate&#151;and the presidential candidates&#151;follow 
  suit.<br>
</p>
]]>
      
   </content>
</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Damning Right-Wing Quotes</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/politics_and_other_bullshit/damning_rightwing_quotes.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2007://1.117</id>
   
   <published>2007-06-29T14:55:51Z</published>
   <updated>2007-06-29T15:07:12Z</updated>
   
   <summary> NIXON ON FEAR VS. LOVE: People react to fear, not love - they don&apos;t teach that in Sunday School, but it&apos;s true.&quot; ON ETHICS: &quot;Publicly, we say one thing....Actually, we do another.&quot; ON JEWS: But by God, they&apos;re exceptions....</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Politics and Other Bullshit" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[</font>
<p><font color="#000000" face="Times New Roman" family="SERIF" size="4"><b><font face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif">NIXON<br />
  </font></b><font face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif"><br />
  </font></font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="2"><b>ON 
  FEAR VS. LOVE:</b><br />
  <br />
  People react to fear, not love - they don't teach that in Sunday School, but 
  it's true." <br />
  <br />
  <b>ON ETHICS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>"Publicly, we say one thing....Actually, we do another."<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON JEWS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>But by God, they're exceptions. But Bob, generally speaking, you can't trust 
  the bastards. (Referring to Jews to Bob Haldeman)<br />
  <br />
  The Jews are irreligious, atheistic, immoral bunch of bastards.... The lawyers 
  in government are damn Jews.<br />
  <br />
  You can never put, John, any person who is a Jew on a civil rights kind of case, 
  or freedom of the press kind of case, and get even a ten percent chance. . . 
  . Basically, who the hell are these people that stole the papers? It's too bad. 
  I'm sorry. I was hoping one of them would be a gentile.<br />
  <br />
  "You know, it's a funny thing, every one of the bastards that are out for legalizing 
  marijuana is Jewish. What the Christ is the matter with the Jews, Bob? What 
  is the matter with them? I suppose it is because most of them are psychiatrists."<br />
  - May 26, 1971 (White House Tapes released March, 2002)<br />
  <br />
  What about the rich Jews? The IRS is full of Jews, Bob.<br>
  -14th of September 1971<br />
  <br />
  <b>JEWS VS. BLACKS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>NIXON: Jewish families are close, but there's this strange malignancy that 
  seems to creep among them â€” radicalism. I can imagine how the fact that Ellsberg 
  is in this must really tear a fella like Henry to pieces â€” or Garment. Just 
  like the Rosenbergs and all that. It just has to kill them. I feel horrible 
  about it.<br />
  ZIEGLER: Could make up an English name.<br />
  HALDEMAN: - Rosenstein could change his name. - _[general laughter]<br />
  ZIEGLER: It is right. It's always an &quot;Ellsberg.'<br />
  NIXON: Every one's a Jew. Ellsberg's a Jew. Halperin's a Jew.<br />
  HALDEMAN: Gelb's a Jew.<br />
  NIXON: But there are [unclear] â€” Hiss was not a Jew. Very interesting thing. 
  So few of those who engage in espionage â€” are Negroes. - In fact, very few 
  of them become Communists. If they do, they like, they get into Angela Davis 
  â€” they're more the capitalist type. And they throw bombs and this and that. 
  But the Negroes. â€” have you ever noticed? - Any Negro spies?<br />
  HALDEMAN: Not intellectual enough, not smart enough - not smart enough to be 
  spies.<br />
  NIXON: The Jews â€” the Jews are, are born spies. You notice how many of them 
  are just in up to their necks?<br />
  HALDEMAN: A basic deviousness.<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON HIS CRITICS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>N: I think we can destroy him [John Dean] -- we must destroy him.<br />
  Haig: Have to.<br />
  N: We never can allow this to happen - even if I was guilty as hell, but I'm 
  not (unintelligible). I was dragged into this, son of a bitch, because of stupid 
  people. Well-intentioned stupid people.<br />
  Haig: That's something entirely different. Here we've got a vicious little coward 
  who's trying to protect his ass at any cost.<br />
  N: And therefore he's got to be destroyed.<br />
  -May 8, 1973<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON MEXICANS VS. BLACKS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>&quot;I have the greatest affection for them [blacks], but I know they're 
  not going to make it for 500 years. They aren't. You know it, too. The Mexicans 
  are a different cup of tea. They have a heritage. At the present time they steal, 
  they're dishonest, but they do have some concept of family life. They don't 
  live like a bunch of dogs, which the Negroes do live like.'<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON BLACKS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>&quot;The second point is that coming out - coming back and saying that 
  black Americans aren't as good as black Africans - most of them, basically, 
  are just out of the trees.&nbsp; Now, let's face it, they are.&quot;<br />
  -Richard Nixon to Donald Rumsfeld July 11, 1971 (White House Tapes)<br />
  <br />
  &quot;You have to face the fact that whole problem [welfare] is really the blacks. 
  The key is to devise a system that recognizes this while not appearing to...'<br />
  President Richard Nixon<br />
  <i>-Alone In the White House</i>, p. 110<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON INDIANS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>"The Indians are bastards anyway," Kissinger told the president. <br />
  "They are starting a war there."<br />
  "While she [Gandhi] was a bitch, we got what we wanted too," Kissinger said. 
  <br />
  "She will not be able to go home and say that the United States <br />
  didn't give her a warm reception and therefore in despair she's <br />
  got to go to war."<br />
  "We really slobbered over the old witch," Nixon told Kissinger<br />
  -White House Tapes,&nbsp; Nov. 5, 1971<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON GREEKS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>"I don't want to see this country to go that way. You know what happened 
  to the Greeks. <br />
  Homosexuality destroyed them. Sure, Aristotle was a homo, we all know that, 
  so was Socrates."<br />
  -May 26, 1971 (White House Tapes)<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON ITALIANS:<br />
  </b></font></p>
<p><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="2">&quot;They're 
  not like us. They smell different, they look different, they act different.&nbsp; 
  The trouble is, you can't find one that's honest.'<br />
  Richard Nixion to John Ehrlichman<br />
  -White House Tapes<br />
  <br />
  <br />
  </font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="4">GEORGE 
  W. BUSH<br />
  <br />
  </font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="2"><b>ON 
  FREEDOM AND POWER:<br />
  </b><br />
  "There ought to be limits to freedom.&quot;<br>
  - May 26, 1999<i><br />
  <br />
  </i>"If this were a dictatorship, it would be a heck of a lot easier, just so 
  long as I'm the dictator."<br />
  -CNN transcript from 12/18/2000 (photo-op with Congressional leaders)<br />
  <br />
  "You don't get everything you want. A dictatorship would be a lot easier."<br />
  <i>-Governing Magazine </i>July, 1998<i><br />
  <br />
  </i>"A dictatorship would be a heck of a lot easier, there's no question about 
  it."<br />
  <i>-Business Week, </i>July 30, 2001<i><br />
  <br />
  </i>&quot;This is an impressive crowd: the Haves and the Have-mores. Some people 
  call you the elite - I call you my base.' <br />
  - at the Al Smith Dinner, New York,<b> </b>October 20, 2000.<br />
  <br />
  <i>&quot;</i>When you're the president's son and you've got unlimited access 
  combined with some credentials from a prior campaign, in Washington, D.C., people 
  tend to respect that. I mean, access is power. And I can find my dad and talk 
  to him any time of the day.&quot;'<br>
  - August, 1992<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON AMERICA'S SECURITY:<br />
  <br />
  </b>"I don't know where bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don't care. 
  It's not that important. It's not our priority."<br />
  - George W. Bush, 3/13/2002<br />
  <br />
  "People don't need to worry about security."<br />
  - February 23, 2006, on his Administration approving the sale of six major U.S. 
  shipping ports to the United Arab Emirates. Two of the hijackers involved in 
  the September 11, 2001, attacks came from the Persian Gulf country, and most 
  of the money for the plot was funneled through the banking center of Dubai. 
  Dubai was a key transfer point for illicit nuclear technology sales to North 
  Korea, Iran and Libya that were led by Pakistani scientist A.Q. Khan.<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON BLACKS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>&quot;Do you have blacks, too?'<br />
  -to Brazilian President Fernando Henrique Cardoso<br />
  <br />
  <br />
  </font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="4">DICK 
  CHENEY<br />
  <br />
  </font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="2"><b>ON 
  HAVING PRINCIPLES:<br />
  </b><br />
  "Principle is OK up to a certain point, but principle doesn't do any good if 
  you lose." <br />
  - Dick Cheney, White House Chief of Staff, 1976.<br />
  <br />
  &quot;We also have to work the dark side, if you will. We have to spend time 
  in the shadows. It's going to be vital for us to use any means at our disposal."<br />
  - September 16, 2001<br />
  <br />
  <b>AS A ROLE MODEL FOR AMERICA'S CHILDREN:<br />
  <br />
  </b>&quot;Go fuck yourself."<br />
  - On June 22, <u>2004</u> Leahy and Vice President Dick Cheney participated 
  in the US Senate class photo. During this time, Cheney upbraided Leahy for Leahy's 
  recent excoriations of Cheney over Halliburton's alleged war profiteering. The 
  discussion ended with Cheney telling Leahy to "... go fuck yourself" and giving 
  Leahy the middle finger.<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON CIVIL RIGHTS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>In 1986, Cheney voted against a sense-of-the-House resolution calling on 
  the white-controlled government in South Africa to free Mandela. (He eventually 
  was released in 1990.) Cheney also opposed economic sanctions against South 
  Africa. He voted against measures that sought to ensure the application of a 
  variety of US civil rights laws.<br />
  - Michael Kranish, Boston Globe, p. A13 Jul 26, 2000<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON THE THREAT OF SADDAM HUSSEIN:<br />
  <br />
  </b>&quot;The question in my mind is how many additional American casualties 
  is Saddam worth? And the answer is not very damned many.'<br />
  -to the Discovery Institute after the first Gulf War, on August 14, 1992, when 
  he was Secretary of Defense.<br />
  <br />
  &quot;Saddam Hussein's offensive military capability, his capacity to threaten 
  his neighbors, has been virtually eliminated.'<br />
  - April 29, 1991, at the Soref Symposium talking about the First Gulf War.<br />
  <br />
  </font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="4">DONALD 
  RUMSFELD<br />
  <br />
  </font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="2"><b>ON 
  LYING:<br />
  </b><br />
  "Don't quote me on this, okay? I don't want to be quoted on this, so don't quote 
  me - Sometimes the truth is so precious, it must be accompanied by a bodyguard 
  of lies."<br />
  - U.S. Department of Defense, News Briefing, September 25, 2001<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON THE SANCTITY OF HUMAN LIFE:<br />
  <br />
  </b>"Have you killed anyone yet?"<br>
  - to General Charles Holland<br />
  <br />
  <b>ON BLACKS:<br />
  <br />
  </b>This July 22, 1971, conversation (National Archives) lasted about an hour 
  and focused on Rumsfeld's future in the Nixon administration. At the time, the 
  39-year-old Rumsfeld was counselor to the president.<br />
  Nixon: "It doesn't help. It hurts with the blacks, and it doesn't help with 
  the rednecks because the rednecks don't think any Negroes are any good."<br />
  Rumsfeld: "Yes."<br />
  Nixon: "Black Americans aren't as good as black Africans. Most of them are basically 
  out of the trees ... Now, my point is, if we say that, they [Nixon opponents] 
  say, 'Well, by God.' Well, ah, even the Southerners say, 'Well, our n--ger is 
  [unintelligible].' Hell, that's the way they talk!"<br />
  Rumsfeld: "That's right."<br />
  Nixon: "I can hear 'em."<br />
  Rumsfeld: "I know."<br />
  Nixon: "It's like when our black athletes, I mean the Olympics, are running 
  against the other black athletes, the Southerner may not like the black but 
  he's for that black athlete."<br />
  Rumsfeld: "That's right."<br />
  Nixon: "Right?"<br />
  Rumsfeld: "That's for sure."<br />
  <br />
  </font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="4"><b>CONDOLEEZA 
  RICE:<br />
  <br />
  </b></font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="2">Rice 
  has served on the board of directors for the Chevron Corporation, the Charles 
  Schwab Corporation, the William and Flora Hewlett Foundation, Transamerica Corporation, 
  Hewlett Packard, The Carnegie Corporation, The Carnegie Endowment for International 
  Peace, The Rand Corporation, and KQED, public broadcasting for San Francisco.<br />
  She was also on the Board of Trustees of the University of Notre Dame, the International 
  Advisory Council of J.P. Morgan, and the San Francisco Symphony Board of Governors.<br />
  She also headed Chevron's committee on public policy until she resigned on January 
  15, 2001, to become National Security Advisor to President George W. Bush. Chevron 
  honored Rice by naming an oil tanker <i>Condoleezza Rice</i> after her, but 
  controversy led to its being renamed <i>Altair Voyager</i>.[9][10][11]<br />
  <br />
  </font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="4"><b>SCOOTER 
  LIBBY:<br />
  <br />
  </b></font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="2">In 
  1996, Libby wrote a novel titled &quot;The Apprentice,' which has recently gained 
  new attention. A <i>New Yorker</i> columnist reprinted passages describing extremely 
  graphic scenes of pedophilia, bestiality, rape and incest. One particular scene 
  describes the rape of a young girl by a bear. These scenes are too lurid to 
  be posted on this site, however, you can read the New Yorker article via this 
  link:<br />
  <br />
  <u>http://www.newyorker.com/talk/content/articles/051107ta_talk_collins<br />
  <br />
  <br />
  </u></font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="4"><b>KARL 
  ROVE:<br />
  </b><br />
  </font><font color="#000000" face="Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif" family="SERIF" size="2"><b>ON 
  THE OUTING OF A CIA AGENT:<br />
  </b><br />
  &quot;Wilson's wife is fair game.'<br />
  - to Chris Matthews,<b> </b>July 21, 2003, one week after the &quot;outing' 
  of undercover CIA agent Valerie Plame Wilson (reported in ABC News Original 
  Report, 10-1-2003)<br />
  <br />
  Rove also did work during those years for clients other than politicians. From 
  1991 to 1996, he advised tobacco giant Phillip Morris, ultimately earning $3,000 
  a month via a consulting contract. In a deposition, Rove testified that he severed 
  the tie in 1996 because he felt awkward "about balancing that responsibility 
  with his role as Bush's top political advisor" at a time when Bush was governor 
  of Texas and Texas was suing the tobacco industry.<br />
  <br />
  <b>Allegations of conflict of interest<br />
  </b>In March 2001, Rove met with executives from Intel, successfully advocating 
  a merger between a Dutch company and an Intel company supplier. Rove owned $100,000 
  in Intel stock at the time but had been advised by Fred Fielding, the White 
  House's transition counsel, to defer selling the stock in January to obtain 
  ethics panel approval. Rove offered no advice on the merger which needed to 
  be approved by a joint Pentagon-Treasury Department panel since it would give 
  a foreign company access to military sensitive technology. [36] In June 2001, 
  Rove met with two pharmaceutical industry lobbyists. At the time, Rove held 
  almost $250,000 in drug industry stocks. On 30 June 2001, Rove divested his 
  stocks in 23 companies, which included more than $100,000 in each of Enron, 
  Boeing, General Electric, and Pfizer. On 30 June 2001, the White House admitted 
  that Rove was involved in administration energy policy meetings, while at the 
  same time holding stock in energy companies including Enron.<br />
  <br />
  </font></p>
]]>
      
   </content>
</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Pistol Whipped</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/politics_and_other_bullshit/pistol_whipped.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2007://1.54</id>
   
   <published>2007-04-17T16:05:48Z</published>
   <updated>2008-10-07T02:21:47Z</updated>
   
   <summary>Fufilling the Asian overachiever stereotype in the most tragic way possible, South Korean student Cho Seng-Hui committed the worst killing spree in American history at Virginia Tech yesterday. His weapon of mass destruction? A common semiautomatic pistol, which in Virginia...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Politics and Other Bullshit" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[Fufilling the Asian overachiever stereotype in the most tragic way possible, South Korean student Cho Seng-Hui committed the worst killing spree in American history at Virginia Tech yesterday. His weapon of mass destruction? A common semiautomatic pistol, which in <a herf="http://crime.about.com/od/gunlawsbystate/f/gunlaw_va.htm">Virginia can be bought by anyone off the street</a>. Virginia, in fact, has long been held up as the sort of state with lax gun-control laws that lets criminals from DC and New York waltz in, stock up on artillery, and bring the weapons home to momma. (All you need is a computerized background check and two forms of ID&#8212no waiting period.)

And what did President Bush have to say? Our dear leader, who killed more people with a pen as governor of Texas than Cho did with a pistol, sent out his press officer, Dana Perino, for the daily press briefing. In response to reporters asking whether this will change White House gun-control policy all Perino had to say was that "As far as policy, the President believes that there is a right for people to bear arms." She then proceeded to duck all further critical inquiries like a fundie confronted with a trilobite fossil.

This, in our learned opinion, is bullshit. The NRA may be withholding their statement now (having learned their lesson when Columbine happened around the time of their national convention eight years ago&#8212also in an election year), but they're not going to let this slip, especially with the presidential race heating up. There are a lot of people who vote with their trigger fingers, and the Republicans specialize in pandering to them. The NRA gives an assload of campaign money to congressional and presidential candidates that promise a semiautomatic rifle above every mantle. However, the Virginia Tech Massacre highlights our need for a comprehensive, rationalized, national gun-control policy&#8212no matter what the political cost. And, in this election year, it's doubtful that even <a href="http://www.corporatemofo.com/stories/060410Pesach.htm">Moses himself</a> can keep up the political will that lets states like Virginia have such lax gun-control lawa.

You can read our opinion about Why Liberals Don't Like Guns <a href="http://www.corporatemofo.com/stories/021210guns2.htm">here</a>, but the fact is that, unlike, say, slavery, our <a href="http://www.corporatemofo.com/stories/040201bellesiles.htm">so-called "gun culture"</a> is not part of American history and heritage. Rather, it was a marketing creation of arms manufacturers who feared a business downturn after the halcyon days of the Civil War. Today, gun manufacturers still do a booming business&#8212almost 812,000 pistols were produced in 2003.

Gun manufacturers tell us that the solution to gun crime is for everyone to carry one. Our answer is that gun manufacturers should be put on trial as accessories to murder.]]>
      
   </content>
</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Coming Soon... a Whole New Corporate Mofo</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/coming_soon_a_whole_new_corpor.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2007://1.41</id>
   
   <published>2007-04-08T23:24:53Z</published>
   <updated>2007-04-09T05:40:05Z</updated>
   
   <summary>As you may have noticed, Corporate Mofo is undergoing a bit of a facelift as we convert to a Movable Type-based format. We hope to re-launch soon with a more functional, interactive site. Bear with us as we carry all...</summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[As you may have noticed, Corporate Mofo is undergoing a bit of a facelift as we convert to a Movable Type-based format. We hope to re-launch soon with a more functional, interactive site. Bear with us as we carry all our old files over to the new format... and meanwhile, check out <a href="http://www.nerve.com/regulars/">Ken's series of articles on "The History of Single Life"</a> on Nerve.com.]]>
      
   </content>
</entry>
<entry>
   <title>Reed is Evil</title>
   <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://corporatemofo.com/media_and_mediocrity/reed_is_evil.html" />
   <id>tag:corporatemofo.com,2007://1.42</id>
   
   <published>2007-04-08T01:06:02Z</published>
   <updated>2007-04-09T16:28:01Z</updated>
   
   <summary><![CDATA[&quot;How is it going? Still working for the evil empire?&quot; I asked, the young man, just out of MBA school, who had been hired by Reed Elsevier. I wasn't looking for a fight. &quot;What do you mean evil? Do think...]]></summary>
   <author>
      <name>Ken Mondschein</name>
      <uri>corporatemofo.com</uri>
   </author>
         <category term="Media and Mediocrity" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
   
   
   <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://corporatemofo.com/">
      <![CDATA[&quot;How is it going? Still working for the evil empire?&quot; I asked, the young 
man, just out of MBA school, who had been hired by <a href="http://www.reed-elsevier.com"><font color="#0000FF">Reed 
Elsevier</font></a>. I wasn't looking for a fight. 
<p>&quot;What do you mean evil? Do think Hitler was evil?&quot;</p>
<p>&quot;Sure,&quot; I said, unsure where this was going.</p>
<p>&quot;Then how can my company be evil?&quot;</p>
<p>&quot;Well, because Reed Elsevier pushed my company out of business in a single 
  breath.&quot;</p>
<p>&quot;We're free to choose who we buy from. Aren't you? Don't you shop at Wal-Mart?&quot;</p>
<p>&quot;Um, but Reed wouldn't even let me bid on work. They wouldn't take my 
  phone calls when I tried to offer them the same price as the companies from 
  India.&quot;</p>
<p>&quot;Did we break any laws by doing that?&quot;</p>
<p>&quot;No, but pushing the laws to their limits doesn't make an action like 
  driving dozens of typesetting companies into bankruptcy and putting all of their 
  workers in unemployment lines doesn't make it right.&quot;</p>
<p>&quot;So you're saying you're against capitalism?&quot;</p>
<p>The conversation didn't improve from there-which isn't surprising for a conversation 
  that starts with Hitler and heads straight towards communism. </p>
<p>And why do people have to go right for Hitler? Is there no measure of evil 
  smaller than world war combined with genocide? As the child of a Holocaust survivor, 
  I would like to humbly request that we keep Hitler out of discussions of the 
  cruelty one man deals another that falls short of those cataclysmic extremes.</p>
<p>Moreover, why am I anti-capitalist because I think Reed-Elsevier pushes their 
  weight around economically?</p>
<p>I admit freely that at the time, my company couldn't compete with India for 
  the labor intensive task of typesetting. Neither could my other competitors. 
  And when Reed Elsevier bought up about 25% of the publishing industry that was 
  my customer base, they dutifully sent the work where it was cheapest.</p>
<p>I don't think they were wrong. I don't think outsourcing is, by definition, 
  bad. But I do disagree that Reed's actions were simply the natural result of 
  an honest capitalist.</p>
<p>The reason is oligopoly-a consolidation of buying power. If I shop at Wal-Mart, 
  I am only one buyer making one decision among many I will make. By comparison, 
  Reed had become one of just a handful of buyers of typesetting, and they did 
  it in just over a five-year period from 1994 to 1999. The time between their 
  last acquisition of Harcourt, which led to them having 30% of my company's business, 
  and their decision to dump us was less than 6 months. </p>
<p>Could my company have adapted to overseas competition? Yes. And we were. We 
  had, in fact, established our own operation in Manila where we paid people three 
  times the going rate. We were well on our way to matching the prices from anywhere 
  in the world through a combination of technology and efficiency brought by treating 
  our workers with respect.</p>
<p>But time is what we did not have. And, as a direct result, my company's 150 
  employees in America and 50 in Manila lost their jobs. Because we were small 
  ($10 million in annual sales) versus our customer (over $7 billion) we were 
  crushed by their choice to &quot;shop at Wal-Mart.&quot; </p>
<p>Now back in the early part of the 20th century, big business argued against 
  minimum wage laws because they would &quot;deny the right of employees to negotiate 
  with their employers.&quot; That meant, if you offered to work for a dime an 
  hour, that was your choice-which was ludicrous because the worker in that situation 
  had no negotiating power.</p>
<p>Does believing that it is government's duty to alleviate that natural disparity 
  of power that develops under capitalism make me a communist or anti-capitalist? 
  I don't agree with that at all. I firmly believe in &quot;free markets.&quot; 
  But I also think oligopolies are no better than monopolies for the growth of 
  a free economy.</p>
<p>So was it OK for Reed not to use my company? Of course. If my company was non-competitive, 
  was it OK for it to go out of business? Probably. Was it legal to buy up 1/3 
  of my customers and then cut us off the vendor list in six months? Likely. Was 
  it Hitler? Not even close. But was it &quot;good?&quot; No.</p>
<p>It was evil.</p>
<p>And I think the Reed-Elsevier ethics manual says it best.</p>
<p>&quot;Some types of conduct are always illegal under certain competition and 
  antitrust laws. Employees and other representatives of Reed Elsevier must avoid 
  even the appearance of such conduct.&quot;<br>
</p>
]]>
      
   </content>
</entry>

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